My friend Jim Storer brought up a really great topic of conversation on his blog recently about online transparency and whether lifestreaming presents offline threats to those who frequently disclose their whereabouts. While I could go into a number of ways that I could easily stalk a stranger (use of IP addresses, public records, physical following, etc) the reality of the situation is that today’s digital natives don’t have many options in terms of erasing points of entry into their personal lives.
I know a lot of people who are up in arms over the most recent Terms of Service modifications on Facebook because they worry about not having ownership over content that is uploaded online. While it’s a relevant conversation to today’s Internet world, I can’t help but look ahead towards future Internet users who have no say in the matter at all.
The Digital Parent’s Dilemma
There are times when I see pieces of user-generated content floating around my timeline – Flickr photos of families, Saturday soccer games, Twitpics of birthday parites, Qik videos of toddlers running around in their diapers. All the while, I keep thinking about the kids being documented and I just tell myself, “Thank goodness my parents didn’t have access to this stuff when I was three.”
There are betamax videos of myself taken when I was little that will never be on Youtube. There are awkward school photos of myself that will only ever be displayed on my family’s fireplace mantle. Lucky for me, I became an adult before the Internet gave rise to the social web. Consequently, I always had the ability to choose when I would create an online presence for myself and what that would consist of.
For many children of the digital age, they simply won’t have the choice.
Parental Terms of Service in a Web 2.0 World
As the child of a digital immigrant, you are subject to the following Terms and Conditions (upon birth):
“You hereby grant your parents an irrevocable, perpetual, non-exclusive, transferable, worldwide license (with the right to sublicense) to (a) use, copy, publish, stream, store, retain, publicly perform or display, transmit, scan, reformat, modify, edit, frame, translate, excerpt, adapt, create derivative works and distribute (through multiple tiers), content featuring you. This content may be (i) Posted on or in connection with the websites and social networks that will (a) enable other users to post on other properties and (b) to use your name, likeness and image for any purpose, including commercial or advertising, each of (a) and (b) on or in connection with the services or the promotion thereof.
[modified from Facebook's new terms of service]
Realistically, I don’t think many kids will care when they see that they’re Google-able before age five, but this raises important questions regarding the future of parenting and privacy. Is it okay for parents to share their kids online without their consent? I know tons of parents who have already made this choice (some even pick baby names based on domain name availability) and I often question whether kids will grow up feeling a little bit violated. I went through my phases of teen angst in middle school and I can only imagine what kind of backlash parents are going to feel when their teens come locked and loaded with statements like, “You put me on Youtube and my friends found the video! I hate you!”
With sites like baveo and totspot, which both offer social features for expecting parents, the rise of the digital fetus is certainly upon us. Hopefully for parents, it won’t mean the rise of the angry teen.
Are you a digital parent? If so, how do you decide what goes up on the web and what doesn’t?
5 Comments
Great Article!! I am a Dad of two boys, I share my precious moments with my BabySpot profile. Security features are #1 for me! I built BabySpot.com strictly for my boys and to be able to share those moments with family and friends without placing those pics/videos on myspace or facebook….Its all about my boys! That’s how I use my BabySpot. I am sorry if this sounds like an ad..lol but I am really excited about be able to offer parents in the digital age a BabySpot Profile!
Nice Blog by the way!
Thanks
James
Co-Founder of BabySpot.com
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/jamesatbabyspot
James,
Awesome that you found this blog post! I like what you wrote in your comment regarding having a designated place to share content that’s NOT on Facebook. Given the recent hoopla surrounding the Terms of Service, I make it a point to be very careful in terms of what I post and don’t post on Facebook. As an end-user, you’re really limited in your ability to protect how your content is shared. Great to hear that you’ve taken that into account when thinking about Babyspot.com.
I didn’t say this in my post, but as much as I’m thankful that my parents didn’t use Web 2.0 to share my childhood photos and videos, part of me does appreciate parents today who do. While some might feel slightly violated, I do know that they will appreciate seeing the happiness and love that’s embedded in that content.
Thanks for reading,
Alexa
Thanks for the shout out Alexa. This has been a topic that’s been on my mind for a while and I do what I can to minimize my (and my family’s) exposure. What I’m sure of is my kids will have a very good understanding of how to navigate the myriad ToS and permission structures when it comes time for them to start sharing in the digital world.
Jim | @jimstorer
As a parent of a 3-year-old whose life I occasionally chronicle online, I too have concerns about what’s appropriate to post. For example when our daughter was 18-months-old we had a very cute picture of her but she was jay-bird and my wife was adamant about not putting it on our blog for a variety of valid reasons.
Of course some of what I see people sharing on Facebook is far too TMI. When I was in college all the same embarrassing pictures were taken but their half-life was measured in months and the circle of viewers was smaller – and didn’t include parents or potential employers/clients. Does Web 2.0 mean that people will change behaviors or that new transparency will lessen hypocrisy?
Thom – great to see you on here
Thanks for reading and good to meet you the other day.
I don’t think Web 2.0 is going to change behaviors at all because individuals drive the technology. Even though the tools and mediums for communication might evolve, we’re still going to see similar patterns of human behavior. The difference is our willingness to give up privacy for the sake of transparency.
I had someone tell me the other day, “You kids have no respect for privacy. You’re all a bunch of voyeurs and attention seekers.” This may be true, but I’d rather see this than a generation that’s dishonest, anti-social, and selfish.